Like most words, they get tossed around a lot and I absorb them. I never truly understand what they mean. One could argue the people who were saying them, don’t understand either. It was time to do a Google deep dive (without the “helpful” AI summary at the top.) “Once in a Blue Moon.” Depending on which definition you pick, it can actually be a fairly regular and scheduled occurrence. However, the way the phrase has been used, always made it seem to me it was only a few times in a lifetime – some planetary (and magical) alignment. In…
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And maybe that’s what it’s supposed to be It seems like whether we want to or not, December reminds us of things – that we wanted or want to do. My forgotten dreams come as I remember earlier holidays and/or while I’m making plans for the holiday into next year. I will pick up some old dreams I had when I was younger and check them out, again and again. Year after year. At the same time, I will also hear that incessant chatter in my brain about bringing back lost dreams and “who were you when you were kid?…
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We are prepping for the Holidays Though this might be termed a “you and I” relationship, if it is one that breaks down just because you raise an objection, then it is not the sort of relationship you need in the first place. – From “The Courage to Be Disliked” by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga. My calendar has been telling me. I’ve been blatantly ignoring it. Yes, the holidays are coming. I have these gentle reminders (warnings) that start in July. These (supposedly) make sure I ask myself the right questions while NOT in the stress of holiday planning.…
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I, however, I really could do without it This is my partner and my best friend’s favorite holiday. I, however, I really could do without it. (My first choice of holidays to stop would be April Fool’s Day. Then it would be Halloween in a close tie along with St. Patrick’s Day.) I have no problem with the trick or treating, the dressing up, the candy, the decoration (except for the pre-bought spider webs, that I just don’t understand). I’m game for everything food related because it is fun and because well, food. It is always the obligation of the…
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(it’s a celebration and I don’t like it) Toward the end of July is normally where I would take a day off and celebrate my birthday. (Though it’s not remotely near my “official” birthday.) This is where I sound like the cranky old lady I am. I don’t like celebrations. Especially if they are about/around me. My idea of celebration, of relaxation is to hole up in my house, in silence, reading, writing and eating without any interruption. No people, no noise, just me, being me, wandering through my house in silence with my thoughts running through my head uninterrupted…
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This is THE mountain I will die on. March 2024 Interrupting my normal schedule because we aren’t even two weeks into this and I’m miserable. Yes, it’s Spring in the Northern Hemisphere but I hate every moment of it EVERY year. It feels so disjointed and false. I write this same thing to myself EVERY year as a reminder to myself. My least favorite time of year…where my body wants it to be earlier and the clock says it is later. And the sun definitely does NOT match the number on the clock. I am NOT a fan of Daylight Savings…
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I actually wrote most of this in November of 2022 – again, I am baffled and frustrated that it still is relevant I’m awake. I got up and meditated, did my morning routine and even read for about 20 minutes. Then connected with the world by checking email. That’s the only extent I ever really want to connect with the world. I feel so defeated regularly. I feel like everyone walking around are polar opposites. I fear that at any point, someone is going to decide they don’t like something I say. They will decide I’m a threat and are…
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It’s the weird space after Christmas and between New Years. I used to work during this time. It was actually my busiest time of year since no one else wanted to work. This is the second year I’ve been off during this week’s holiday. And it is a LOT of space. I find myself discombobulated. I have plans, things to do, and I’m still “working” (on my own things.) It’s this weird space of “do all the things you can’t normally do while you are working FT” and “it’s a vacation not using your PTO days – make it count!”…
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What you look for you find right? All of a sudden, I’m listening to and reading all about visibility. Mostly the fears behind it, what we want it to look like, what it ACTUALLY looks like and the desire to essentially NOT be visible in the world. We want to go about living our lives and NOT partake in the crazy that usually comes out while living those said lives.. It usually goes something like this: If we are visible -> we get not so nice comments and not so nice people. To deal with it (or decide not to…
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This is a random post from my archives. Written in 2016 but still relevant today. Scarily relevant actually. With some updated tweaks of course. In the midst of the decorating, cooking, cleaning and prepping for the holidays, in true marketing fashion, it’s also the time to figure out… “What amazing things (Lose weight! Get organized! Get your finances in order! Pay off debt!) What are YOU going to do in the new year?!” OR “Who do you want to BE this year?” (That wonderful “don’t think you have to DO anything” just decide to work on yourself and be someone…