June 2023
Listening to The Still Small Voice can get a bad rap.
How many people have you heard of or talked to that made a seemingly insane, unhealthy or irresponsible choice that said “I just know I have to do this? I don’t have a good reason. I know I just have to.” (PS: I have been one of those insane people but stay with me.)
You listen, trying to be patient but you really want to shake them and yell “What is wrong with you?! Have you thought this through at all?!”
I am a default Billy Joel fan and though it is not a happy song, my favorite is ”Downeaster Alexa.” (All the violin and reverberation – it’s such a visual song – love it.)
“I got bills to pay and children who need clothes…”
The whole song is about a fisherman – who clearly isn’t doing well (along with all the other fishermen in the same boat *bada ching*) and is having a hard time.
I don’t know if it’s his dream or if it’s a job that he feels the need to stick to…
But there are real (life altering) consequences to “following your heart,” “following your passion,” and “doing what I think is right” that don’t get enough airtime.
Let’s be honest, “Think things through before you make a decision,” doesn’t inspirational meme well.
I’ve known many people (myself included as mentioned above), who throw things, people, their lives away over what they believe is the voice of God issuing them a commandment.
I’ve also talked to many people (including myself, my first and favorite hobby) who feel they have a calling but know that there would be serious consequences if they made that choice.
At one point in my life, I worked 3 jobs to make ends, sorta-kinda meet. Enough of a meeting that bills were “mostly” paid and the credit card debt wasn’t skyrocketing (much.)
It was an icy day and I was on the schedule to work. And I needed to work. I needed to pay for the car that was taking me to the work(s).
This car was notorious for being awful in the weather. Completely useless. And I lived on a road that never got paved.
I sat there frozen. I needed the money. Like “I wasn’t sure how I would pay for the car next month if I didn’t work these few hours” needed the money.
But if I took the car out, well, odds are good that I would NOT get to work anyway. And that I would then have to then pay more money to get the car out of a ditch or repair it from damages when it slid off the road.
I called out of that shift. And I remember getting push back about it.
And my conscience had a field day.
“You need to do the right thing no matter what. You agreed to this job and you need the money. You need to find a way to work today’s shift.”
“But if you go in, you are likely going to do damage to your car (and maybe others) and if you can’t make the car payment, you sure as hell, can’t pay for an accident on top of that.”
“Still, you could drive as far as you can (say you end up in a ditch) and then walk. You could get into work.”
“Okay, but then tomorrow when you have to go to work #1, you have to deal with the car. Walk to it and/or get it towed and repaired. That will take time away from the better paying job #1…which essentially will negate what you make today.”
There are real life consequences to the choices we make every day.
Just as there are real life consequences to quitting your job to be an artist, running off to a foreign land, or dumping all your money into this stock that “they said” was going to be fine. Real life consequences to “following the voice” – The Still Small or otherwise.
It sounds good to say “I followed my inner voice and it all worked out.”
The reality is MUCH more complicated (and sometimes more depressing) than that.
I would argue that The Still Small Voice never puts you in that type of situation. It is not a gambler, telling you to give your last penny in hopes that you will get $20 or $100. It is not transactional. And it takes into account the realities of your life (as absurd as it may be.)
It doesn’t abandon or ignore those realities. It doesn’t ask you to throw caution to the wind, cross your fingers and see what happens. It may ask for vulnerability and it may ask for trust.
But that’s different than betting it all on a roulette table and expecting not to lose the whole pot.
The Still Small Voice is nuanced when dealing with the expectations of Reality. And I believe The Still Small Voice doesn’t want a buy-in or any action UNTIL AND IF you have considered and thought through all the reality things that you have on your plate.
“I got bills to pay and I need to be clothed.”
And so do you – it’s not wrong to question and consider every voice you hear with that in mind.