September 2023
Pervasive Self-Care Myth: You deserve the *$80 lotion*, *$600 dress*, *$1,200 coffee maker*…whatever your gazingus pins are.
I’m going to use lotion here for this example…
Continuation of Pervasive Self-Care Myth: “Yes, you could use the $10 drugstore lotion. But isn’t it so much better (And don’t you feel so better?) when you use the pricey $80 bottle that smells like gardens and money?”
I won’t even go into how much garbage (chemicals and millions of things you shouldn’t put on your skin) is in the $80 lotion of gardens and money. (Or the $10 drugstore lotion but that’s a whole other post.)
I bought into this.
(And I sometimes still do. I’m human and I want to be the *best* human I can be. I want to “win” the self-care contest that we’ve bought into – which definitely beats the martyr one I sometimes find myself traveling back to.)
And in the process of buying into this, it is ABSURD! how much lotion I’ve bought & tried. And given to friends. And pawned off on strangers. Left it in places that I hoped someone else would pick it up and use it.
How much time, money and life energy has this quest for “the magic lotion” cost me?
I don’t want to think about it – I’d probably cry.
I learn my lesson and then…
The Siren Song “Well if you are going to use something at least make it enjoyable…”
Bah – tie me to the mast post please. I’ve done this too many times to tempt fate again.
It’s just lotion. At the end of the day, it’s just a thing. A thing I use (when I remember) to put moisture into my skin.
Have you ever thought about how hard it is to enjoy THINGS?
How THINGS (when life is stupid tough and awful) are so INCONSEQUENTIAL?
Someone you love is in critical condition?
Coffee in a Styrofoam mug in their presence while they are in the hospital is worth millions more than that perfect hand painted mug sitting alone at home.
What if we let things be things?
THINGS don’t define who we are.
Things are USEFUL.
Things are NECESSARY.
Things help us CONNECT with people.
Things help us do MAGIC.
They are NOT the magic.
I’m not saying that things can’t help us and make life easier…
I’m not saying that things don’t enhance our surroundings, our lives…
I’m not saying don’t use a good, quality, nice smelling lotion…
I’m not saying ignore local, sustainably produced, pretty things…
But when it gets down to it – let’s remember that THINGS are just that and the MAGIC is us.
It’s what magic we give to those things. That tells us if that thing supports us or burdens us. If it helps us be ourselves or helps us put up a facade.
Because as always, it’s about intention. Things are so easy to hide behind, so easy to play games with – when really it could be just as easy to be yourself. A human with things, things that make sense and things that don’t.
Perfectly curated lives- too much work.
Perfectly created (messy, seemingly mismatched) lives – that’s the sweet spot. That’s real.