What an elementary school project taught me about life…
June 2023
From The Enchanted Life, Sharon Blackie…
“The messages are clear: sometimes, you have to step off the path you are so determinedly striding along and learn a few more skills. And learn them properly – through your own lived experience, not experience copied from others; and by continuing to learn for however long is necessary, from someone who really knows. These stories tell us that sometimes it’s okay to feel that you’re not progressing, because, as we’ve already seen, the myth of progress is another of those profoundly pernicious myths which our culture forces upon us. Sometimes it is okay to say that you don’t know, you’re not sure, you’re still trying to figure it out for yourself – and to avoid like the plague the people who are trying to sell you ready-made solutions of their own.” (Emphasis mine.)
I devoured this book in a weekend, feeling like a cool pool of refreshing water and a warm blanket at the same time.
When I ran into the quote above, I read it over and over a few times.
“There” I said to myself. “This is what I’ve been trying to explain my whole life.”
When I was in elementary school, we had to do reports on one of the States. We did this twice – so we ended up doing two states over the entire school year. It included the prerequisite report that regurgitated the facts from the one set of Encyclopedias in the library. And maybe a fact from a random 20 year old book or two that the library happened to have. This was the mid-80’s and our library was the size of two classrooms on the third floor of what always felt like an abandoned building. (Never mind that we inhabited it for 7 of our formative years – it always felt that way).
The first state that I was assigned was Indiana. First we handed in our report. After that was graded and approved we had to have something to “present” – a visual aid. I think we were going to do a parade around the school hallways with them, up and down through the three levels with the long staircases (which looking back as a 41 year old just seems so…odd.)
My father was laser focused on my school work back then. I had an idea of what I wanted to do but as any child knows, what the parent wants always wins out. I helped to glue items onto a stained piece of wood (father) that had wheels (father) to showcase Indiana. There was a string (also my father) to pull it along. I am pretty sure I got an A – but I barely remember that project.
The second time around I was assigned Oregon and I remember telling no one. I knew I couldn’t win so I just didn’t engage (explains much about me actually.) I was going to do exactly what I wanted. I found a mid-size cardboard box and I cut a round hole in the front. I colored the backdrop as I imagined Oregon looked like (mountains, rivers and trees) with my crayons. I continued that theme and river over the bottom of the box likely including all the prerequisite items like the state bird, state flower and popular state export. (Couldn’t tell you if my life depended on it…but Google tells me it’s microchips…I have a feeling it was different back in 1988.)
Just like I couldn’t tell you the state specifics on Oregon, I couldn’t tell you any more of the details. What I do remember is how proud I was of this cardboard box visual aid for Oregon. It didn’t come out exactly like I wanted (none of my creative projects ever do, even as an adult.) I was so proud that I figured out how to make it work within the limitations of MY abilities and understanding. And hiding it until the last minute from my parents (which now I’m an expert at as they will tell you.) I got a B on that project. That I remember. And I was thrilled.
As a straight A student, this should have horrified me. It didn’t. I think even then, I knew that the whole system was a joke. I got an A on the Indiana project because I had an adult who essentially did all the work for me. In my mind they were rewarding the fact that I cheated – but it was also expected that your parents would help you with these things. I can imagine that things are much worse today.
If I was going to learn though and be my own person, I wanted to try and be graded as myself. I wanted my own experience, my own understanding, no matter the grade or what it turned out like (not necessarily needing “progress” or an A.) It is the only project I remember from those years, the only thing I considered mine.
The streak I exhibited back then still continues. I am grateful that I get to learn from those who have gone before and can save me some heartache and time.
YET…what works for someone will not work for someone else. Or maybe it will once they learn it in a different way or at a different time. The “do it this way because it works!” – may or may not work. 50/50. Maybe.
I take and learn but am always careful – can I integrate this and use it in my own way? Can I bring my history and knowledge to it? Does it pass my “lived experience” test? Is this deep or just surface level information?
There is nothing more full of wisdom than your own lived experience, especially while flailing around trying to find “your solution.” Even if you get a “B” over someone else’s “A.