(listening to truly listen)

November 2025

I happen to like four letter words. A lot. The more blasphemous, inappropriate and unprofessional the better. Because sometimes calling something awful really does not accurately apply to situations that require those unprofessional four letter words.

Unfortunately, since I have no problem using them AND I’m headed into mid-life where I’ve lost whatever filter I have left, I use them much more frequently and in situations where my younger self would have been able to hold back.

But this is not about those four letter words, it is about one four letter word in particular that seems to have more resistance and struggle against it than all the curse words in the world combined.

STOP

In looking it up – because I love to look up words to see how much they have lost their meaning in resonance and understanding over time – it means among other definitions: to close off, prevent passage, make impassable, to cause to give up or change a course of action, arrest progress, cease activity or operation, end.

(Thank you Merriam Webster.)

The most common thing I think of when I think of Stop is that red octagonal with white border and letters stop Sign.

Then I think of how often that sign translates into Yield, slow down a little, or just pay more attention as you cruise through the intersection. So easily that Stop sign turns into “don’t worry about stopping, just be careful.” Traffic lights in more populated places may get you to stop but when it’s 3 am on a cold night with no other light in sight, it might be harder to wait a few minutes at a traffic light with no one around.

Little kids (and adults too) have selective hearing when it comes to this word and another word similar to it – NO. They may keep going to see how much they can get away with, if they really do need to “stop.” It’s their version of yielding to see if anything bad is coming.

As a society, STOP is just as challenging as the word NO. Same thing actually. It keeps us from moving forward – even if we have no idea what forward looks like and not sure we want it anyway.

STOP is so important though. There are things that you get from it that you can’t get from any other state. We can’t hack it, improve it, or slot it in a calendar. The only thing you can do is STOP and see where it takes you – usually outside your calendar, your expectations and your needs.

It’s like riding a bike, there is no way to get the benefits of the bike riding unless you actually DO IT, there are no ways to get the benefits of stopping unless you actually, quite truly, consistently, STOP.

So what does this have to do with Listening to The Still Small Voice?

Stopping is like the fuel in the tank for Listening. It might even give you the opportunity to Listen. (No guarantees though – the voice cannot be purchased with the correct amount of money and pushing the right buttons.)

Stopping means not as much noise, movement, media, thoughts, people and stuff around. It means stopping.

Taking a moment to STOP from your path and then look around. It is not glancing around briefly while still on your path and continuing on.

Because sure, you could just yield keep going (and with rural stop signs, I usually do). But you miss the opportunities that you would only get with stopping – the times, the chances, the interactions just won’t be there. How often do people strike up conversations now in public like they used to? Not so much because we are all on our phones staying busy instead of “stopping” to be in the present.

I regularly get the call to eliminate all the media and stuff that accumulates in my life. Recently I did a deeper clean with more than usual.

Interestingly enough, from that quiet, I found more time and brain space to write, to dream and you know honestly, to just FEEL better.

Even if my Still Small Voice didn’t talk to me, I just felt better. Stopping feels better. There’s a reason we have to sleep and don’t do well when we don’t sleep. It’s not just for our bodies but for our minds and spirit as well.

Stopping – to truly be and truly listen. To give a space, to tell ourselves we do want to know, we truly do want to listen. It’s not a magic vending machine button, stop things, be present, hear the voice – but it does give the opportunity for us to notice that sometimes that machine may out a free piece of chocolate for us to enjoy.

More chocolate, less noise. Listening to The Still Small Voice.